To have and to hold

To have and to hold, from this day forward,
for better, for worse… Glowing words uttered
haltingly, like lines from a high school play,
learned by heart, yet still alien. Today
is a necessary burden, offered

to assuage the desires of well-mannered
society. A photo-op prepared
with eight-by-tens for all to take away
     to have and to hold

forever. But in truth, what just occurred
in this place, the flowers, lace, high-collared
dress, unity flame, champagne toast, DJ,
first dance, are but the entrance toll they pay
for life to which they have not yet matured,
     to have and to hold.


About Andrew Kreider

I'm a poet and musician,transplanted from London, England to beautiful northern Indiana. By day I am a stay-at-home dad with our three kids while my amazingly talented spouse conquers medical school one long shift at a time. At night, I'm a performer and trouble-maker. I love my life.

9 responses »

  1. But then there is divorce which happens to half, so I guess the holding they will no longer have..haha…great verse.

  2. amazing how that special day seems to melt away as the years pound on a relationship… it takes a lifetime to mature… clinging to that first love

  3. nice to mature and grow together …..thanks for sharing x

  4. The trappings are not it. They hardly matter, surely.

  5. true that…there is lots of life to be lived after the I do and much to learn as two become one…it is much more than a ceremony…

  6. I appreciate this very honest, well written appraisal. I often wonder how many, young girls especially, think getting married is about the wedding ritual, and not the ever after. Well said.

  7. wow what a great look at marriage and wedding well penned

  8. marriages take work, not a jigsaw puzzle.everyone wants to have a fairy tale in their life, not all get it.awesome point made.

  9. a lot of truth in this for which not every couple is prepared. they can get so caught up in plans for the big day, they forget the lifetime that must come after. thanks for sharing.


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